Sunday, 6 December 2015

The curse of the Christmas Tree

Will Christmas 2015 be any different now we have an 8 month old baby? Probably not if the last 2 years are anything to go by. You see every year we seem to have this curse and it always involves the Christmas tree...

The flying Christmas tree that became the lame Christmas tree

Mr Bomber decided a few day's before Christmas day that he would try and be helpful and put the tree up himself. He spent a good hour arranging the branches, placing the baubles and wrapping the lights around. He announced he had finished. The tree was unveiled, I actually thought that he was taking the piss. The baubles were down one side of the tree and yes he had put the lights on last. He was genuinely pleased with what he had achieved. I'm not one to suffer from Ornament Corrective Placement Disorder (OCPD) but the result was the tree was flung across the living room in a minor disagreement and it became a little bit broken. This resulted in me doing a shopping trip at 8pm that night to locate a new Christmas tree. I found a cheap plastic pre lit Christmas tree. I still firmly believe that Mr Bomber did this entirely on purpose so he would never ever be asked to decorate the Christmas tree again. He still insists that it was a genuine effort at decorating the tree.

This will never be our Christmas tree!

The last real Christmas tree left at the saw mill tree

Knowing I had bought a slightly lame Christmas tree the previous year due to the flying Christmas tree incident we decided we would purchase an actual real Christmas tree. It was about a week before Christmas day so plenty of time to wonder around laughing and joking, holding hands as we wondered through the trees trying to decide on the PERFECT tree. The reality was turning up to the local saw mill on the large country estate and finding one lonely 7ft tree left lying on its side, the only tree they had left. It was a bit wonky and one side had grown more than the other. We had no choice other than to hand over the £50 and give the tree a loving home for Christmas.

The we have an 8 month old baby, playpen and nowhere to put the Christmas tree, tree

This year we have gone with the slightly lame Christmas tree from 2 years ago. We have no space in our living room, as it has slowly being taken over by the multi coloured shit and the baby prison that now sits in the bay window. The Christmas tree is now perched on top of the coffee table that had already been relegated to the sidelines of the living room. This was due to Bomber using it as a baby climbing frame. This is seriously dodgy territory as Bomber is not shy of grabbing things he wants, however to ensure maximum safety we have placed him on the floor and put his arms into the air. We can confirm that Bomber is not tall enough to ride the Christmas tree and no baubles are in grasping reach. All we have to do now is make sure he doesn't eat through the electrical cables and we will all survive our first Christmas tree experience together as a family.

Square Peg Mum

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